Thoughts about men:
"All men are stupid. Some are just less stupid than others."
"He has a dick. Therefore he is a dick."
Thoughts about me:
"You're a hopeless romantic. It's not a problem; it's just something you need to work on."
Thoughts about my burning desire to get a dog:
"Animals are just not supposed to be domesticated."
Thoughts about lying to get out of a date:
"I don't feel like I am a bad liar; I just feel bad for lying."
Thoughts about opting out of disability insurance:
"I mean it's not like I have a family to feed if my arm gets cut off."