much-to-celebrate-monday: endless summer, summer's end.

Oh my word, y'all. It's Monday... 2:22 a.m. Hawaiian time... and I am at clinicals celebrating something fierce: my pager hasn't gone off once AND tonight is my very last shift... As much as I enjoyed that one day in the North Shore with an adorable surf instructor by the name of DJ {who personified an endless summer}, I am so ready for winter + to get off this island. By this time tomorrow night, I will be somewhere over the Pacific Ocean en route back to the "mainland" ... where winter is in full force! 

I will skip off that plane floating on clouds + reunite with great friends over hazelnut lattes.  It will be an insanely quick rain-city-reunion where I will individually hug every single one of "my people" that I am still in denial that I have even said good-bye to yet... it's see you later, friends. We will celebrate over donuts + locally brewed beer + cupcakes. I will write finals + attend meetings + hand in evaluations + write papers + check things off my dreaded "adult to-do list" but I'll do it all smiling because I'm home. There will be sparklers + paper lanterns + I will celebrate until the sun goes down + be up before it rises Thursday morning where I will celebrate the completion of my second to last quarter + begin the 100 day countdown until I finish school on an early flight to a snowy mountainous village South of Seattle. I will have a 2-day layover with two of my other halves... We will celebrate in bridal boutiques + cry as the futch bride tries on wedding gowns + we'll take silly pictures in hideous bridesmaid dresses. We will celebrate togetherness + drink hot cocoa by the fire + stay up really late giggling... and come Sunday when this amazing celebration comes to an end, I will have arrived in Knoxville + I will fall asleep, exhausted + heavily happy, to the twinkling of the christmas tree lights with a certain calmness in my head + fullness in my heart... waiting for my reeseybird to wake up to kick off eight weeks of me trying to dress as cool as two-year-old.     

how 'bout dem apples?

Washington {the state} is known for it's deliciously crisp apples + one random Saturday back in October {probably around the height of my obsession with all things Fall}, Celeste + I decided to carbar our way up to the northern most apple orchard in WA, just below the Canadian border, to get our hands on our very own bushel. 

Spurred by a craving for caramel apple cider, we arrived in the middle of nowhere with a glossy glee in our eyes + were given a huge bucket to fill. After hours of drinking the bottle of wine we brought taking turns riding in the wagon, rolling in the dirt, + taking the most awkward photogs ever, the farmer was quite shocked when we returned back to the barn covered in grass with only a few {I'm talking like eight} very carefully selected apples in our bucket.

We were just as shocked to learn that apple picking was not nearly as relaxing as wine tasting {I'm not sure why in my mind they were practically the same thing} but Mr. Farmer insisted on giving us a full basket + some amazing honey to dip our apple slices in to for later. 

After much debate in the car ride home, ten gallons of apples in tow, we came to the conclusion that we don't really like apples anyways... and will be sticking to the vineyards in Eastern Washington to fulfill our cravings for beverages made from fruit that grows on trees from now on.

a tethered ball, a fleeting fall + the adorableness of turning two.

At the end of September, I flew to Knoxville for the weekend to celebrate Bird's 2nd birthday where Kara transformed their driveway into a full-on carnival, complete with a carousel + popcorn machine {that's a whole other blog post in the making!}. It was such a lovely celebration full of many moments to love + dote on little Reeseybird that extended throughout the entire weekend!

Kara knows all the best places to celebrate every season + my favorite memory of the weekend was taking Reese to a pumpkin patch just South of Knoxville to indulge in all things Fall. Two-year-old toddlers + their amazing imaginations are my absolute favorite and Reese's exaggerated reaction to just about everything makes even feeding smelly goats just the cutest thing you've ever seen. 

Be still, my heart. 

Good gracious, this was one fleeting Fall. I turned another year wiser on the eve of the start to another Autumn quarter.  Pumpkin patches sprouted up along roadsides and I overused the phrase, "Happy Fall, y'all!" getting lost in corn mazes. I drank my weight in pumpkin spice lattes every morning on my way to work + stopped to admire the red, orange + yellow leaves that peppered the hilltops in every neighborhood. I exclusively wore a variation of the oversized sweater + leggings + boots combination and wandered aimlessly through the streets of Seattle taking in the perfect crisp air that was coupled with the superfluous sunshine that is September in the PNW's best kept secret. I became addicted to consumed a bowl of butternut squash soup {Local 360's with that delectable dollop of pumpkin-flavored greek yogurt is my favorite!} at least three times a week + curled up with a wooly scarf to watch college football every Saturday. It was perfection.

Aside from the fact that next week is finals week, the subtle cues that  usually signal an encroaching winter have been sorely delayed this December being trapped on a tropical island, an isle that I have endearingly renamed Hellwaii. But if there is one place that always feels homey + cozy and has been up to its stockings in holiday spirit since November 4th {when she put up the Christmas tree}, it is the Williams residence. I am counting down the days (less than two weeks) until I return to Knoxville to settle in for the holidays and experience Christmas through the eyes of a very imaginative 2-year-old + ring in the new year with Grams, Creed + Kara waiting for baby boy W. {Dub, as I like to call him} to arrive...
...but little mister, you better stay put in that perfect little womb of yours for these next couple of weeks! We are anxiously awaiting your arrival and absolutely cannot wait to meet you, either... but grow bigger + get stronger to the cadence of your mama's heartbeat for just a little while longer. The world awaits you. 

throw it all into the ocean + let it be, pollyanna style.

I gotta go. It's time to spread my wings and fly, higher than the bluest skies. 

November 22nd: You are probably not cognizant of the fact that today marks the two year anniversary of that cold + snowy winter day when I unknowingly said good-bye to my best friend. I have replayed that moment over and over so many times in my mind, sometimes jolted awake by the nightmare realization that it really was the last time I would see your face, sometimes getting lost in intricate daydreams of alternate endings...

...I was gonna marry you.  

It was one of the first snowfalls of the winter. Our fingers had interlocked in the middle of the night + I woke up paralyzed to the sound of your heartbeat, wanting this moment to last forever. Morning came, not many words were exchanged as you got ready for work + I quietly gathered the last of my things around the apartment. A montage of the happier times raced through my mind, feeling conflicted as to why I would ever need to leave the comfort of this place. Tears rushed down my face as you balanced my boxes with your briefcase and I walked slowly behind you down that long hallway, noticing every contour of your body. Were you always this handsome?

The wooden floors creaked beneath us as we descended down the three flights of stairs of our old character apartment in silence. The wisps of wind stung my cheeks as we stepped out in to the middle of the street. A blanket of snow had covered the cars that lined Corydon overnight and as you drew me in, snowflakes landed on your lashes. I felt the world's spin slow down wrapped in your arms and as time stood still for just an instant, I saw the degree of assurance in your eyes as you kissed me. "Go find yourself. It will be okay. I love you." 

Just so you know, I never thought you'd let me go. 

& I never imagined just how okay I would really be. I never thought finding peace in my heart would emulate an overwhelming amount of gratitude from the very same place that used to be so stricken with pain. I am so-very-grateful for your ability to let me go; to recognize an irreconcilable difference that I could not see lost in the moment.

Throw it all in to the ocean + let it be. 

That happiness I set out in search of found its way to me, in the form of a fully restored heart, one that has found its beat again. You taught me a tremendous amount about myself + helped me to realize just what it is that I want in this world. I am a better person because of you. Thank you for coming in to my life at a time that I needed you the most + letting me love you in a way no one else could. & thank you for the many amazing memories we made that I will forever hold in a happy place in the deepest boroughs of my heart. 

I was your girl but in the end, it wasn't what you wanted.

A wise woman once said that it takes half the amount of time you dated someone to get over them + as I put the dream of us behind me for one final time, I stop + smile. She was absolutely right. Two years + an incredible amount of growth later, it feels so marvelous to carry on confidently in the direction of new dreams, pollyanna style.    

you, sir, were a wonderful four years.

color me rad.

I don't consider myself an avid runner but I do consider routine running some wicked kind of therapy for me + I have found a direct correlation to the amount of happiness in my life with the amount of running I am doing. I have tried to participate in at least one race a year {Rock & Roll 2009} since I ran that dreaded full marathon {once in a lifetime was more than enough...} through Disney World back in 2008. After running the bridge-to-brews 10K in Portland in April in preparation for the Avenue of the Giants half marathon that I finished in May, I was delighted to participate in Seattle's Color Run the very next weekend... just for fun! 

The Color Run is a super rad {and easy!} 5K that raises money for the Ronald McDonald House, a place where many families can stay to be near their hospitalized children...my very own mama included when little Christopher was in the NICU. Dubbed the happiest 5K on the planet, I don't think I stopped smiling once... especially during the explosion of color, the amazing party at the finish line! 

It was the perfect spring day at Seattle Center and although the race was awesome {awesome: {as in} I was still sore from my half seven days prior, took my sweet time accumulating maximum color by walking through the color stations + I didn't pay attention to my race time in the least bit}...

...my favorite part was joining my roommate for mimosas + biscuits at my favorite breakfast restaurant, Serious Biscuit, afterward..

+ heading to the my absolute favorite beach in Seatown for the rest of the day to soak up the first sunshine of the summer at Golden Gardens with some of my Seattle favorites.

Color me awesome.

I already have the date saved for Lululemon's SeaWheeze Half Marathon for next year! Megalina, will you please join me? =)    

these are a few of my favorite moments.

Twenty-twelve, the NICU-infused blur that it has been, has not afforded a lot of time to sleep, eat healthy, exercise, keep in touch with anyone other than google scholar + most importantly, blog! In fact, I have blogged less in the last nine months as I  usually do in one month {same goes for exercising, sleep, k.i.t.-ing...} and it has broken my heart a little to watch each month fly by, undocumented + uncelebrated... ...but my heart smiled this morning when I woke up  remembering today was  the first day of December + I actually had today off to start the best month of the year off right {Read: on a beach, soaking up sunshine + reading a Nicholas Sparks' book from cover to cover}!! I could use some Christmas spirit in my life and the lover of all-things-holiday in me refuses to let this last month go unnoticed, unspirited + uncelebrated... no matter if its still 80 degrees outside, I am isolated on an island for clinicals, it's practically finals week, my  life is packed in a basement back in Seattle + I'm starting a new travel assignment in two weeks in Tennessee {good gracious, when is this year going to end?!} I have several countdowns in my calendar {nine days left in Hawaii, 12 days left of the quarter, 16 days until I'm at Kara's, 25 days until Christmas, 112 days until I am done with school} + I am going to spend this final month remembering a few of my favorite memories of twentytwelve... starting with a day trip to Rialto Beach. 

Celeste + I have gone on a lot of Sunday dates in the last six months in Seattle {I wrote about our first one here.} One Sunday at the end of summer, we decided to drive to the end of the Earth. We loaded up my car with the dogs, not enough beer + boarded the ferry over to the Olympic Peninsula. I misread the directions and thought it was only about an hour once we crossed the Sound but one accidental detour through Forks {where Twilight was set} + four hours later, we finally arrived at the most magical beach to watch the most breathtaking sunset that seriously lasted for hours... once the insanely thick layer of fog cleared.  

We were basically walking along the horizon + I'm fairly certain that if you looked close enough as the sun was sinking, you could see it simultaneously rising in Australia.

The driftwood was so massive + made the perfect place for campers to hang a hammock to watch sunset by their campsite. I was so envious.   Have you ever seen a sun so huge... or orange? #nofilter We didn't see any vampires or werewolves but the cotton candy clouds that filled the sky at twilight were amazing. These pictures do them absolutely no justice. I'm sorry, sky.

Happy December, y'all.