Friday, August 08, 2008

relationship vs. responsibility

When I think of the word relationship, I can’t help but exclusively associate words that possess a positive connotation such as “complementary”, “akin”, “reciprocal”, “connected.” Sure, any kinship takes a little effort but when you are ready to take the risk, this supposed “work” shouldn’t feel like drudgery at all but more of a natural devotion, an innate investment for we all know nothing comes free in life (even if the price is concealed in simple stares and clavicle kisses) and like all else, hard work (in theory) should pay off (even if the reward is internal).
I guess it lies in what you consider a successful gain to gauge if your effort was worthwhile or, on the contrary, if your judgment (for one reason or another) was completely jaded and really your attempt never had any real potential of capital gain. Simply put, if two investors (or friends or family members or lovers) are working towards the same outcome (i.e. for the other one to be happy) their goal should ultimately be met (love will be all around) if adequate effort is put forth. It is when a vague, undefined goal is set (or not set, really) that makes it much harder to make advances towards anything, for what you are working for is left unknown (which may be perceived as amounting to nothing). The ambiguity can be frustrating; if you let it I guess.
Digressing back to the notion that no relationship should be viewed as work, it should also never feel like an obligation or some sort of sacrifice. Lost in a confused thought about how one could possibly compare a relationship to that of a negative resonating word like “responsibility” (for all my responsibilities are usually something that I don’t particularly enjoy doing but, quite unfortunately, I am obligated to uphold them), I consulted Webster to clarify the huge difference between the two. A relationship, merely a state of affairs existing between those having relations, can be a romantic or passionate attachment or the way I see it is an “added happiness” that signifies a special cognation between two individuals. A responsibility is that of a moral, legal, or mental accountability: burden. I may be going out on a limb but I’m assuming that anything that feels oppressive or worrisome will never elicit satisfactory results or ever be considered a worthwhile investment. I’m no financial planner but it seems plain to see that anyone who felt as though something as significant as a relationship is nothing more than a tyrannical fret, that the next logical step would be to back out before you lose it all, to cash in your chips and reinvest in something that makes you genuinely happy or start saving up for something really spectacular, like a pink house.
Rereading this reminds me of my first semester of college when I would literally pull all-nighters bullshitting papers for philosophy. I had no idea what I had actually just said; I just thought of an idea and ran with it. Nonsense or not, I always got an A.

No comments: